Just a Little Post-Op Pondering

Some interesting things can happen when you're under the influence of such substances as demerol, vicodin, and tylenol with codeine. For example, you may be experiencing the effects of one (or more) of these drugs if you, for some reason...

* think you see a Siberian tiger basking lazily in the middle of a frequently-traveled, local intersection. (Heather, think Levan and Schoolcraft, here)

* truly believe that everything you see has a somewhat lime-greenish tint to it, and can't quite figure out why that might be. and I wasn't wearing goggles, either, folks.

* are utterly convinced that you MUST, by ANY MEANS NECESSARY, completely re-style and re-decorate your home to comply with each and every principle of feng-shui. no, really.

* find yourself wondering about the Amish and swimming, if they're allowed to swim in its traditionally accepted format, and what kind of tan lines Amish bathing suits would produce. it's not a bad question, actually.

* dream about yourself as an Arabian princess with your own personal turban, monkey, and waterboy, and see your United States Embassy Ambassador lover (gallantly portrayed by Kenneth Brannagh) running at you through a crowded fruit market with a sword, carrying a bushel of tropical fruits on his head. no joke.

True stories, all. Well, true delusions... or whatever.
Anyway, I'll have the play-by-play and more edge-of-your-seat excitement to share in the near future about the surgery and more of those fun details that I know you're *dying* to hear about my recovery... HAHAHA. Just kidding!

For now...

May I recommend eye surgery for *all* your hallucinogenic desires...?